Today, I was in the shower when I saw a big black spider crawling on my stomach. I flicked it off, and when I didn't see it on the floor, I assumed it went down the drain. Then, as I was getting dressed, the spider fell out of my belly button dead. FML
Today, I had an appointment with an allergist. Turns out that I have absolutely no food allergies, and I have been avoiding the foods I love for the last two years for no reason. FML
Today, I was doing a lab in chemistry involving caustic crystals. My lab partner decided to dump the crystals from their safety container into my hand. An hour later, my hand had black chemical burns all over it. They will be there for a month. FML
Today, I learned that my younger sister spent the sterling silver dollar I had bought her from the Vancouver 2010 Olympics to buy herself a KitKat bar. I spent a good $60 on that coin. FML